Romanticisation of Motherhood
A few years ago, I watched a debate where the proposal was: ‘This house regrets the romanticisation of motherhood’, suggesting that motherhood has been idealized, overrated, and restricted—confining women to an ivory tower that imprisons rather than liberates them. According to the Cambridge Dictionary, romanticisation means ‘to talk about something in a way that makes it sound better than it really is, or to believe that something is better than it really is.’
But is motherhood truly romanticized, or is it simply misunderstood in an increasingly secular world? If we view the role of motherhood solely through a materialistic lens rather than a spiritual one, we risk overlooking the continual sacrifice, struggle, and compassion that many women experience. What some call romanticisation is, in reality, an acknowledgment of the immense contributions of mothers—contributions that are often unpaid, unrecognized, and taken for granted.
The Devaluation of Motherhood in a Modern Society
In contemporary discourse, there is a growing narrative that glorifies financial independence above all else. Women are encouraged to reject traditional roles and instead pursue careers that contribute to a global workforce. But in this relentless pursuit, has society inadvertently diminished the value of motherhood? When women prioritize corporate ambition above their intrinsic roles, they become another cog in the economic machine—trading their invaluable position as nurturers and educators for a tax code and a paycheck that often barely covers expenses.
This reminds me of the biblical story of Esau, who sold his birthright (inheritance) to his brother Jacob for a mere bowl of lentil stew—prioritizing immediate gratification over long-term blessings. Have modern women been similarly misled, trading a deeply fulfilling role for a societal ideal dictated by corporate interests? In a world devoid of spiritual guidance, are women being funneled into the so-called ‘rat race’ rather than being honored for their unique and irreplaceable contributions?
The Islamic Perspective: A Balanced Approach
Unlike secular society, where a woman’s worth is often measured by her economic output, Islam offers a holistic view that honors both her spiritual and worldly roles. The Qur’an beautifully describes the relationship between men and women as: “They are a garment for you, and you are a garment for them…” (Qur’an 2:187). This metaphor signifies mutual support, protection, and complementarity—not competition. In Islam, a woman is not forced to choose between career and family; rather, she is given clear rights and responsibilities that enable her to flourish in all aspects of life.
Far from being an outdated or restrictive concept, Islam elevates the status of motherhood to the highest spiritual level. The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) stated: “Paradise lies at the feet of the mother.” This is not a form of romanticisation meant to confine women but an affirmation of their irreplaceable role. Yet, this narrative is largely absent in modern discussions about gender roles, where motherhood is often dismissed as secondary to professional success.
The Price of ‘Liberation’
The modern economic system demands women return to work shortly after childbirth, not out of personal ambition but out of financial necessity. Mortgages, rising living costs, and job insecurity force many mothers to leave their infants in daycare, severing crucial early bonds. This is not liberation; this is economic enslavement.
Rather than acknowledging the fundamental role of motherhood in shaping the next generation, society now equates success with long work hours and financial contribution. Meanwhile, the family unit weakens, children grow up with less maternal guidance, and mental health crises rise—symptoms of a society that undervalues maternal presence and prioritizes economic gain over well-being.
Rediscovering the Value of Motherhood
However, more women today are awakening to the significance of their former roles. They recognize that being a mother and housewife is not a sign of weakness or lack of ambition but a noble, dignified calling. Raising and nurturing children is not merely a personal duty but an act of service to society. Mothers shape future generations, instill values, and create homes filled with love, wisdom, and spiritual depth.
A godly woman is not just a mother—she is an educator, a counselor, a healer, a creator, and a nurturer. These qualities are invaluable not only within the home but also in broader society. Yet, for her to truly flourish, she needs to be in an environment that values her unique role, provides her with economic and emotional support, and allows her the flexibility to balance her responsibilities.
Islam acknowledges that women have ambitions beyond motherhood and grants them the right to education, employment, and personal growth. However, it also advocates for a society where women are not penalized for choosing to prioritize their families at crucial moments in life. A truly just system would allow mothers to embrace their roles without fear of financial hardship or societal judgment.
Conclusion: A Call for True Empowerment
Instead of regretting the romanticisation of motherhood, perhaps we should celebrate it. Not as an exaggerated or idealized notion but as a genuine recognition of its significance. The words of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) remain a timeless truth: “Paradise lies at the feet of a mother.” Rather than erasing or diminishing the role of mothers in the name of progress, let us elevate and honor it.
A woman’s worth is not solely defined by her career achievements or economic contributions but by the love, wisdom, and nurturing she provides to her family and community. True empowerment is not about forcing women into a single mold but giving them the space, respect, and support to embrace the multifaceted roles they were designed to fulfill.
Let us move beyond the narrow definitions of success dictated by a materialistic society and recognize the beauty, dignity, and power of motherhood. Instead of questioning its romanticisation, let us ensure that mothers receive the appreciation, support, and reverence they deserve.